2011-07 – July 2011 Coaching Hour – Conquering Fears

I’m going to think about that a little bit, but that was a unique way to say that. I know that when I’m in my zone talking to you-guys tonight or when Vicki or I are in our zone teaching we’re not telling ourselves how good we’re doing and come on, let’s just do one more, we’re going to shoot. We’re just kind of letting things flow and letting it happen.

And I’ll open this a little bit up to discussion to anybody that’s on the line. I understood what Bob is saying, but I think that in our sport because of the planning phase of our shots there has to be some sort of an analysis and some sort of self-talk, telling ourselves what it is we’re about ready to do, reconfirming the breakpoint and the focal points; but after that, during the shot there certainly can’t be any self-talk, and self-talk doesn’t necessarily have to be spoken words. It can be words that stream through your mind, and we’re going to talk in a few minutes about what creates that stream of endless babble that ends up in our minds and oftentimes comes out through our lips.

So, anyway, we’ll think about this. I’m going to call Bob and talk to him about this but I thought it was a very unique thing to say, you know, when you’re actually driving a car, you’re not telling yourself what to do. You think drive car to there, and there’s not much self-talk, and that’s basically because you’ve driven a car 10,000 hours or more.

 Bob P: Gil?

 Gil: Hello. Is that Bob Palmer?

 Bob P: It’s Bob.

 Gil: Are you moving stealth tonight,  Bob?

 Bob P: No karate class tonight.

 Gil: I am honored you are here. And, guys, I didn’t know he was going to be here. And did you see how much credit I gave you?

 Bob P: Thank you.

 Gil: Tell me what you think about what I said.

Bob P: Oh, I think you’re absolutely dead on. And in the planning phases, of course, that’s when you have the opportunity to weigh some options. You know, your unconscious is going to go, oh, is the breakpoint here or there but once you made your decision, bingo.

 Gil: Hard to do.

 Bob P: Yeah. You got to do it.

 Gil: Yeah.

 Bob P: And I did have an instruction with Steve Brown about that, and he does use some anchor words.

 Gil: Right.

 Bob P: But they’re completely different than self-talk.

 Gil: Yeah. Self-talk is endless babble brought on by fear. Is that what you’re referring to?

 Bob P: Yeah, and doubt and, you know, thoughts like: man do we have the right chokes or, oh, man, I’m not sure I see it well, that tree, oh, my goodness. You know? That kind of thing going on; and an endless discussion inside where you’ve got to step back from that and go, okay, I feel good, I’ve done it a million times, just do it.

 Gil: Provided you have done it a million times.

 Bob P: You still have to have that feel.

 Gil: Yeah.

 Bob P: You kind of got to trick yourself that you’ve done it a million times.

 Gil: Yeah. Well, Steve evidently called you and talked to you about it?

 Bob P: Yes.

 Gil: Dad-gum it. We ended up back up on that cul-de-sac again, aren’t we?

Bob P: Yes. Steve doesn’t let much get past him.

 Gil: Anyway, we’re going to talk. I’ve got a session tonight that I’m going to talk about the “F” word, and I’m interested in what you think. I’m glad you’re here, and I hope you can be here the whole hour. There’s some things that have been revealed to Vicki and I that are specific to our game that are reactions to fear. And what we’re finding is when we explain to people that it is actually fear that’s making them do that, they recognize it as fear, and it’s easier for them to deal with it and anchor back out of it. And I’ll get into that in just a minute. Okay? So, anyway, I’m glad you’re here and I’m glad you clarified that.

 Bob P: Okay.

 Gil: And, in fact, I plagiarized it today. I used it in an article that I wrote in Safari magazine. I talked about how typically people who take up shotgunning for sport or sporting clays as far as wing shooting or for clay target shooting typically don’t realize the amount of dedication and time and repetition that it takes to become really proficient at it.

And I used your analogy of getting in and driving a car. You don’t think about what you’re doing. You just drive..

 Bob P: Right.

 Gil: And it’s just one of those things where you’ve done it because you’ve done it for 10 to 20,000 hours in different vehicles, in different road conditions, and different times of day and night; and you have practiced driving enough to where it eliminates any fear and the fear that creates those mechanical thoughts is the fear of what might happen.

So, anyway, we’ll get to that in just a minute.

Stepping Into Master Class and In Your Own Rat Trap

 Gil: Shane?

 Shane: Sir?

 Gil: Last month we talked about how after you punched into master class, after you came to the advanced school and you punched into master class, things just fell apart. And you and I exchanged a few emails, to put it mildly, and I just emailed you back this afternoon. I’m sure I don’t know whether you read it or not, but I felt like that you brought out the best in me in that series of emails.

And if you don’t mind, just kind of go through where you were and what fear, because I believe that you’ve recognized that it was fear that put you in the state you were in. Would that be correct?

 Shane: Absolutely.

 Gil: Okay. Well, would you share with everybody a little bit of how the fear manifested itself in you and what it did to your thought process, et cetera, and then we’ll talk about how we got past that?

 Shane: Well, I sent you an email before, and fear for me does not travel alone, and it manifests itself in doubt and eventually frustration. The first thing I would doubt is always myself, my abilities, my judgment, my move, my mount, and my breakpoint. All of that would lead to things like checking the lead, stopping the gun, looking at that sexy, sharp gun, so on and so forth. And then shortly after that frustration would follow, and I know where it came from.

This goes back to probably for many people that when you’re a kid there’s the winner and then there’s everybody else, and I shot almost a full year. I started shooting competitively last February, February 2010. And I went to as many shoots as I could, two or three a month, and never did I go except for two times that I did not punch. Punched at State. Punched at Nationals. Punched everywhere I went except for twice. Once I was sick. The other time I don’t know   what happened. I just didn’t punch. But that led to expectation, and I punched into master’s class, and everybody knows around here that’s the shark tank.

 Gil: The shark tank. I thought that was unusual, the shark tank.

Yes. Yes.

 Shane: It’s the shark tank. There are a lot of people in Texas that can shoot. There are a lot of people in West Texas that have a tremendous amount of disposal income and free time. For lack of a better word, there’s a bunch of trust fund babies out here, and they will go and wear courses out. And they shoot a lot, and if you put it on those guys, you feel like you’ve really done something. And that was my goal.

And then there I was in master’s class, and it just wasn’t happening. It didn’t matter what I did. I couldn’t buy a pair. I could go  practice, and it was just ink balls all around. And I would go to a competition somewhere, and I couldn’t do anything right. I was just in the quicksand the whole time.

For me that was kind of hard to admit that I wasn’t going to win, and I can’t tell you how disappointed I was when I went to Fossil Pointe. After punching into master’s class, I went to Fossil Pointe, and I shot like I shot when I started. And everything went back to being mechanical, looking at lead, trying to pull through birds, pull them back too close to the trap. I mean, I could go on through a whole laundry list of stuff that I did wrong at that shoot.

And I have moments of brilliance, and I’d run a station or two and then I’d get twos and threes and fours and threes, and it was just horrible, and I was mortified. I was ready to sell my shotgun. It was a  bad experience to say the  least.

And then we were having those emails and stuff before I went to State, and you insisted it was fear. And I got to thinking about that, and I did a lot of reflection about that, and basically it boiled down to you were right.

 Gil: I was what?

 Shane: Well, I think Vicki was right.

 Gil: I wasn’t — wait, whoa, whoa, whoa. You were on a roll until you said that.

 Vicki: Yeah. You can come back, Shane.

 Gil: You were on a roll until you said Vicki. Now, Vicki has the distinction of always being right. Allow me to be right once every now and then. Okay?

 Shane: Okay. You were right, Gil.

 Gil: All right. Did everybody hear that?

 Brian B: I never heard that.

 Gil: So what did I tell you that you feel like was right?

 Shane: It was fear. It was all about fear. Namely the biggest thing for me was, I don’t know if you remember the email that you sent me about shooting straight with myself, and that was right towards the end of the Oklahoma shoot.

 Gil: That was right after you questioned whether or not I gave you a good answer —

 Shane: It was.

 Gil: When I told you to shoot straight.

 Shane: Shoot straight. That’s what you said, shoot straight. And I thought about that for several hours, and I replied to your email and went to bed and –

 Gil: You replied to my email and said: You must be tired or you must have run out of really prophetic words to say 

 Shane: Exactly.

 Gil: Something sarcastic and freshmanish.

 Shane: Well, I expected more because you were right, and then I was hoping —

 Doug: You-guys need a counselor.

 Shane: I was hoping that you would be right again. And so you sent me that and you told me to shoot straight, and I kind of mulled that over, and then you sent me back after I sent you that sarcastic reply — probably be the only one I’ll ever send you, by the way.

 Gil: So you’re learning, grasshopper.

 Shane: Yeah. So you sent me that back, and your reply was shoot straight with yourself, and that caused me to think about a lot of things for several weeks after that. And basically the thing that I came up with was I was scared to death of whatever everybody else was going to think about me based on how I was shooting.

 Gil: You understand, Shane, that you’re not alone?

Shane: No, no. I can tell you right now if they have not had this realization, everyone that is on this call is lying to themselves because everybody will want to be number one.

 Gil: You’re right about that.

 Shane: There is only one number one every time everybody goes out there and puts on the numbers and gets the scorecards out. There will only be one number one. If there is two number ones, the shoot-off will fix that, and there will be one hero and for a lot of people a bunch of zeros; and I think that’s unfortunate because you come to realize that that’s not what it’s about. The email I sent you last night, the takeaway was, one of them was I only thought I was having fun before, and I was wrong. Now I’m having a blast. And the second thing that was on there was what other people think of me is none of my business.

 Gil: Boy, is that huge. Bob, did you hear what he just said? Isn’t that a great way to put that, what other people think of me is none of my business? Man, what a great way to put that. Continue.

 Shane: Well, that was the realization. I was scared to death, and I was convinced that I was going to be judged on the numbers on the board, and I can tell you why I was convinced of that.

 Gil: Why?

 Shane: I was convinced because I have judged others on the numbers that were on the board. Now, like we talked about in my email, you know, me and my buddies will go and scan the results of the shoots we didn’t go to or the shoots we did go to; and one of the first places of all we looked after we looked at about the first five or ten in master’s classes is we scanned the bottom of the other classes to see who we knew that shot that was dead last. And then you got to go: Man, you know, that guy is struggling in that class or that guy must have had a bad day or whatever, and there’s a line in there. I put in there. Have you ever set a rat trap and then like an idiot you step right in the damn thing later on?

 Gil: Well, if it’s of any consequence, that won’t be the last one.

Shane: I have no doubt, but that was really the turning point for me.

Letting Go of the Measuring Stick

 Shane: I realized that we’re all geared that way. There’s always some measure. There’s always something that is used to in your eyes measure other people against, and for a lot of us that are competitive and play this game, it’s the numbers on the board at the end of the day.

And so I came up with a couple of plans on how I was to get over that, and the biggest one is I decided I was no longer going to look at any of my scorecards and count them up until the end of the day; and when I go in the morning and we turn in our first course scorecards, people asked me how I shot, and I found that I was able to emote a response that was not tied to my score because I had absolutely no idea what my score was.

 Gil: What was your response?

 Shane: I had a great morning. I learned a lot. I had a good time. I’m out here shooting. I know it’s a hundred degrees, but any day that I can yank on a shotgun is good day. My new favorite  —

Gil: Let me give you one. Let me give you one. Anytime you can look somebody in the eye and in all honesty tell them I did the best I could today, everything is okay.

 Shane: Absolutely.

 Gil: It doesn’t matter how you shot, but if you can look at any performance you have in retrospect and say I did the best I could today, that’ll shut them all up. That’ll make you feel good about yourself because you did.

 Shane: Absolutely.

 Gil: The people that scour the scores, that hang around at the scoreboard and turn it into the wailing wall — and you know what I’m talking about. They’re up there.

 Shane: We’ve all been there, Gil. We’ve all been there. I assure you.

 Gil: Yeah, I know. Those people, they’re never going to be at the top. They just — well, anyway, there is no sense in me spending time on that crap. But yeah, you learned a valuable lesson. Now, I will tell you this. Eventually you’re going to have to face the scorecard.

 Shane: You’re correct.

 Gil: But it’s okay right now to do what you’re doing; but I want you to write down in your log that we talked about this tonight, and I told you that eventually you’re going to have to be able to face the scorecard and let it in, and then turn around and with your pre-shot routine and by being congruent turn around and walk into that cage and work the process, and then get back out and let things flow in and out randomly in your brain because you cannot shy away from and become reclusive when you start shooting well.

You’ve learned that when you shoot well, if you’re out there having a good time, you’ll shoot well. You’ve learned one of the most valuable lessons that you’ll ever learn not only in shooting but about performing in life regardless of what it is you have to do. If you look at it as a learning experience and an opportunity to go have fun and learn things, your performance will always improve. It certainly will.

Just to share with all of you on the line, in a couple of emails I wrote when I was in upstate New York at that side-by-side event, and I had sparse email and I started on the iPad and then it would go out, and then I would get it on my phone somewhere else, and I would try to continue it, and I told Shane. Correct me if I’m wrong. This will be another opportunity for you to say you were right when I get to the end of this story. I told Shane that if you have the balls to shoot five shoots in a row with absolutely 100 percent no fear that you’ll win high overall in one of those shoots.

Did I not tell you that?

 Shane: You did indeed.

 Gil: And what happened last week?

 Shane: I won high overall.

 Gil: No shit.

 Shane: The second shoot after Oklahoma State I shot two Mains on Father’s Day and I shot two Mains on the Fourth of the July, and the sec- ond one was the yellow course at Windwalker, which is the notoriously hard one and I won with a 93. The next closest score was a 91, I think.

Gil: Hum. Just a lucky guess.

 Shane: Knowing how big you said Walker  —

 Gil: What?

 Shane: Tell them how big you said they were. I said you were right. You’ve got to tell them how big they are.

 Gil: They’re just about the size of walnuts. It’s how you use them that makes them big.

 Brian B: That’s right. Absolutely.

Maturing as a Competition Shooter

 Gil: Well I have to be honest with you, Shane. I shared a little bit of your story with Doug Mellen when I was talking to him on the phone the other day. He called and exclaimed at what a good session we had over there on Friday when I talked to him about fear and what fear does to you, and I shared with him what I had shared with you; and, that is, if you can be honest with yourself and actually go in and I could say that because you’ve been to the advanced school. I know what you’re capable of. I’ve watched you shoot. We’ve shot together another couple of times, and you know and I know that you’ve got the talent to do it.

You still need another 15, 18,000 rounds of really intense competition and some really good practice and a little tweaking here and there; and most of that is going to be getting to know yourself. It’s not something that Vicki or I can do for you. It’s going to be putting yourself into the competition and seeing how you react and getting to know how you deal with certain circumstances because it’s not going to be the same for everybody, and that’s one of the reasons it takes so long.

Doug has a friend who shot with us, and he came to him after the lesson and said: Boy, that was a really revealing lesson. I didn’t realize how much I had been looking at the gun and checking the lead. And he said: You know, how long do you think it will take me to get to where I can do what Gil is talking about?

And Doug, I forgot what you told him. But then he looked at Doug and said: Well, it didn’t take you long because you’re just a natural shot. And I think Doug, did you disagree with him at that time; or did you just let him say what he wanted to say?

Doug: Well, it just kind of passed over. I just thanked him for the compliment and told him that there was more to it than that. I was of the opinion that there is some degree of natural ability for a lot of things, especially athletic things; but in the last six months, I’ve come to change my opinion on that.

 Gil: Yeah. Well, there are definitely things that if you do in athletics in another venue that could help you in shooting.  Okay?

 Doug: There are different things.

 Gil: Because it’s all timing, that can help you, but no one is predisposed when they come out of the womb to be able to be a good shotgun shooter or a good pole vaulter or a good chess player. That’s all of     a matter of how many times you’ve done something and how many times you’ve intently been attuned to it and looked at the process and failed and determined to fire the sequence in a different order and had it be right and then repeat and repeat and repeat that and build that myelin sheath.

 Doug: Have you ever heard Tom Watson’s quote?

 Gil: Tell me about it.

 Doug: Tom Watson was on a tear sometime in the ‘70s, and he’s doing an interview, and the interviewer is not really trying to trick him at all; but just said: Tom, you know, it’s amazing that just these last seven or eight tournaments just you’ve gotten a lot of breaks and you’re getting pretty lucky, and he looked at the guy with a straight face and said: You know, the harder I work and the more I practice the luckier I seem to get.